I just...wow. This was haunting. I could feel everything Sam was feeling, his frustration, his hopelessness, his misery. Why didn't he deserve to be happy for just a little while? I hate canon!John with a passion. I think he mistreated his kids horribly (although probably not physically)and I always sort of resent the implication that Sam was in anyway selfish. Anyway you have a beautiful, and as heartbreaking as it is, beleivable story. Thank you for sharing.