Why Did Dean Break After 30 Years and Not Before?

[lovesrain44]

This is in reference to the 4.10 ep, Heaven and Hell, where Dean gives up the goods at the end and tells Sam the reasons why he doesn’t want to talk about hell. We find out the awful truth: that in order to stop the pain, Dean got up off the rack and became a torturer himself.

 

I realized I want to know WTF happened after 30 years that made Dean suddenly change his mind. I mean you don't go through 30 years of torture and then wake up one day and say screw this, do you? (I’m pretty sure Sam feels the same, but he’s being a Good Brother and giving Dean his space. For now, anyway.)

 

Maybe, after 30 years, maybe he hit his breaking point, maybe he got tired of Alistar coming by EVERY single day and just hit his limit.

 

When Dean said, at the end of Wishful Thinking, “…the things I did, the things I saw…” I instantly thought/figured/hoped that there was non-con between Dean and Alistar, because I’m whacked that way, and I kind of thought THAT would be the reason Dean broke. Not that he suddenly gave up one day. Or maybe Hell used Sam in some way, something that Dean thought was Sam.

 

What's most interesting to me is the fact that fanfic never considered that Dean could be broken, that he would make the choice he did as presented in canon. At least not the fanfic I’ve read. (I would be willing to be shown the error of my ways, however.)

I'd love to know what other people think!

Comments

[evermcfearless.livejournal.com]

I think that Dean's breaking point could have been when he finally realized that he's not getting out of there.

Although, I do think it could also be that Alastair did use Sam in some way or maybe one of his parents, maybe had a look-a-like or an illusion or something, of Sam torturing him or something. And I wouldn't put the Non-con past him either.

Either way, it broke my heart to see Dean in such pain, and not only the physical pain, but the emotional pain of finally giving up, which we have never seen Dean do willingly.

[lovesrain44.livejournal.com]

Something had to make that point worse than all the others...

it could be like you point out, kind of like when you wait 15 minutes for someone to show up for a date or appointment, and then you give them five minutes more and THAT's it. Then you walk. At the 30 year mark, Dean said, that's it! I'm done. Stick a fork in me.

Something pushed him over the edge!

Something that, now that I'm thinking about it...well, I'm thinking about the motel fight scene. Forget which ep. Sam says something and Dean starts swinging, taking out the lamp and then Sam. I had the feeling that he was thinking it was all for nothing, if Sam was going to go darkside - somehow related to his time in hell, why did I put up with all that suffering if THIS is the result? Why didn't I break at 10 years and maybe saved myself some grief?

But then, if he'd broken at 10 years, he would have been 30 years a torturer, and that would have been worse. For Dean anyway.

[evermcfearless.livejournal.com]

Wait, so you think Dean knew about Sam using his powers and then he just gave up?

[lovesrain44.livejournal.com]

No, he didn't know while in hell that Sam was using his powers. But when he got out of hell and found out, I'm thinking that part of what pissed him off, besides the fact that Sam was using his powers at all, was the fact that Dean's being in hell, having sacrificed all of that, was of no use. There he was in hell, suffering, holding close to his heart that all of the suffering would save Sam. Come to find out it didn't.

Which doesn't answer the question as to why he broke after 30 years. : D

[evermcfearless.livejournal.com]

Oh, okay.
Yeah, now that I really think about it, there must have been something else that happened for him to just give up. I mean, yeah people break, but Dean is strong and I honestly think he could have held out.

Unless Alastair threatened Sam's life or something.

[lovesrain44.livejournal.com]

Something. Yeah, people just crack under time, they break under the strain, they just will. They're human. But something specific had to happen. IMO. Some straw to push it over.